A List of Can't Do's

A comment in an email that echoed similar ones I've received recently has caused me to seriously consider the impression I am giving in my blog. In the email I was asked if there was anything that I cannot do as if I'm some sort of wonder woman. Nothing could be further from the truth!

I've tried to keep my blog real but perhaps I've fallen into the trap of only ever announcing my so-called accomplishments and glossing over - or hiding - my (many) failures. I am human - very much so - and I would hate for anyone to think that they could not measure up to me. The reality is that I am a very ordinary person who has to deal with her own weaknesses daily. Yes, I've been blessed with talents and abilities, but so has every other woman I know (okay, and quite a few men too but this is one blog post that is really only for women - for those that beat themselves up for failing to fulfil the wonder woman image), and yes God has blessed me abundantly, and for that I can only marvel that He would use me. It's certainly not because I'm any one special that He has chosen me. Instead, it's a measure of His grace and mercy that He has chosen someone so undeserving and so very inadequate.

Anyway, in case I've given the impression of being more than I am, it's time to rectify that and let the truth be known once and for all. To do that, I've compiled a list of my Can't Do's. Some of these Can't Do's are tongue-in-cheek; some are serious; some sad; but all are true.

I'll start with the one that any regular reader of my blog should already know:

I can't cook. Not really. Okay, I can slap a meal together but my cakes tend to be flops, pies and desserts I rarely attempt, and cordon bleu is something I only ever order in a restaurant.

I can't ski. Not water ski. Not snow ski. Not any ski. I've never tried but that doesn't change the fact that I can't ski.

I can't play the flute. I'm trying but I have a feeling that my flute teacher secretly despairs of me ever producing what could be honestly called a beautiful sound.

I also can't play the tuba, the drums, the ukulele, or all other instruments apart from piano, keyboard, guitar (a handful of chords) and recorder (very badly).

I can't seem to lose weight no matter what I do. However I am very good at putting weight on.

I can't start at the beginning of a book and read to the end. I always have to skip through it first so that I know what's going to happen and then I go back and read it thoroughly.

I can't crochet. Well, I can kind of do one basic stitch but it doesn't look that good. I certainly wouldn't say that I'm someone who could crochet (it would be like saying you could play the piano because you could play the opening bar to Chopsticks).

I can't play Chopsticks. I'm not sure who is to blame for that: my music teachers for insisting I learn to play from sheet music or my own poor sense of pitch that I could never pick it up.

I can't ride a bike. Once, long ago, I learnt to ride a bike, and then I fell off it and have never been back on since.

I can't tolerate heights. Or being underground. Or in small spaces. Or going on planes.

I can't make buttonholes or sew in zippers. My sewing machine can't do buttonholes but even if it could I doubt that I would be able to do them. Any skirts that I make are of the wrap-around variety or have elastic in the waists. And I only ever choose patterns that don't require zippers or buttons.

I can't remember names. I never used to have a problem with this, but these days I really have trouble remembering names - regardless of how hard I try.

I can't garden. If I could, I wouldn't have grass taking over my garden just weeks after I'd spent hours in the hot sun digging it all out.

I can't stand blood and gore when it involves one of my loved ones. However, I'm not the one who almost fainted a few weeks back when The Most Adorable Granddaughter#2 took a chunk out of her scalp.

I can't find clothes that look good on me. I guess when you're shaped like a box with a head plonked on top then nothing's going to look good, but surely designers could at least try to cater for my body shape?

I can't do a nautilus bun. Or an orchid bun. Or an easy-wrap bun. Or a heap of other buns that I've printed out the instructions for now that my hair is super long and which I should be able to do.

I can't give speeches. I can't get up and talk in front of people. In fact, I have trouble talking to people even if it's just one-to-one.

I can't share my faith. Not easily. Not in person. Not if it involves talking. If I can write it then it's not so bad but when I have to speak ... well it doesn't come easy to me at all.

I can't surf. I don't think I've ever tried but I don't really like getting dumped so if the waves are really big (you know, anything above "dead flat") then I don't usually go in the water.

I can't make friends. Well not easily. I have some friends but it tends to take me a long time to make friends but then I also tend to hold onto them for a very long time (as in the rest of my life).

I can't wear hats. I hate hats. I mean I really really hate hats. Plus they don't go on a head that already has a huge bun stuck on the back of it. I'm meant to wear a hat at work but I refuse.

I can't abide by the rules. Well most of the time I can unless it involves hats. In fact, I'm pretty good at abiding by road rules and other rules - just not rules about hats.

I can't do a whole lot of crafts that look interesting (jewellery making hair sticks, card making, scrap booking, soap making, mosaics, etc) but which I have no aptitude for.

I can't decide if I want to keep my silver hairs or to dye them.

I can't ignore housework. I wish I could. There are some times it would be better if I could. But I tend to put housework above other things which is not good. Not when those other things are family.

I can't ... and the list could go on.

However what I can do is all things through Him who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13).