Surrendered Wives?

DH and I watched a documentary last night on a new movement that seems to be taking some countries by storm. It's based on a book entitled "The Surrendered Wife" and if the couples they showed are anything to go by, then it's a little scary.

Don't get me wrong. I believe the Bible when it says that wives should be submissive to their husbands. I just don't think the husband has a right to demand it or that it should become just another form of slavery.

Yet watching this documentary, this is the impression that you get: that wives are literally slaves to their husbands and that husbands have the right to dictate every area of their spouse's life right down to what she does each day and wears each day and even how she does her hair.

One husband made a list of household chores for his wife to do each day! As if she wasn't able to think or plan for herself. I wonder if he also told her what friends she was allowed - or perhaps she wasn't even allowed out of the house without him.

Another husband went so far as to say that his wife must give up all her rights and be subjected to him. What!? I think husbands and wives should put aside their own rights and put their spouse's rights before their own but for a woman to have no rights at all and be subjected to her husband's every whim ... I'm sorry, but I don't think that's Biblical.

Despite the fact that the couples claimed to be doing "God's will" (and perhaps this is what was most disturbing about the documentary because it will give all Christians a bad name in the eyes of the world), there seemed to be few examples of the husbands living out their God-given role. That is, loving the wife as Christ loved the church. Does Christ harass us and make demands of us and expect us to act like robots with no minds of our own? No He doesn't force us to do His will but instead waits for us to do it willingly. He showers us with perfect love even when we don't respond in love. He created us in the beginning and wants us to use the incredible minds that He has given us - to use them for Him - not to be mindless ninnies.

Neither was there any mention of the husbands submitting to their wives. And yes, that is in the Bible but is probably one of the most overlooked verses when it comes to marriage!

We shouldn't be afraid of submission - but we should be wary of man-made rules that enforce it. Christ doesn't force us to do anything. Rather in His Word we are given guidelines on how to live which when followed will bring joy and peace.

The last word is found in Ephesians 5:21-33 where we are given a beautiful example of submission and love:

Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church ... Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ so let the wives be to their husbands ... Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it. ... So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. ... let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.