Storms

In the past I've often been amazed when reading through the gospels at how obtuse the disciples appear at times.

Jesus feeds five thousand with just five loaves and two fishes, and, yet not so long afterwards, when Jesus is again surrounded by a hungry multitude of four thousand, the disciples wonder where the food is to come from.

The disciples are in a boat when a storm arises. Jesus is there sleeping, yet they fear for their lives. Think of that for a moment. The Son of God was right there in the boat with them, and yet, still they were afraid. 

I've discovered that I'm no different to the disciples. A few weeks ago when going through a tough situation we knew the presence of God. It was so real to us. And yet, last weekend when things didn't go as planned, when it looked as if we had not turned a corner, but had actually gone backwards, we doubted (or at least I did).

I was upset. And angry. And said some things I regretted. I asked where God was in all this and how could any good possibly come out of what seemed too great a burden to bear.

After putting it off for a time (rebellion would be the correct term) I finally decided to open my Bible ... and I was ... challenged ... comforted ... reminded once again of the great God we serve and that none of this has taken Him by surprise. I wanted answers now but what I needed to be reminded of was that God has it all in hand and He knows the future ... He has the best timing ... and His plan is always perfect.

Even the way I happened to read those verses that day can only be explained by God's sovereignty. Not so long ago I finished my plan of reading through the Old Testament once and New Testament twice over the course of two years (I actually finished early). I was looking for another reading plan, having used this particular one for several years, and came across this one that covers the entire Bible in one year with readings for just five days a week. I like the idea of having two days for catch-up or for reading something else, and so I jumped in with both feet. But after only a few days, I discovered that each daily reading was just a little too long to cover in the time that I had in the morning before work.

Not wanting to give up so soon, I adapted the way I used it. I began to do the Old Testament reading in the morning, the New Testament reading in the evening (if I didn't have time for it in the morning) and "saved up" the Psalms for the weekend. So when I was in my rebellious phrase, and opened my Bible it was the saved-up Psalms that I was reading and these very words that spoke to my heart:

He shall be like a tree, Planted by the rivers of water, That brings forth its fruit in its season (Psalm 1:3, bold mine).

Oh, give thanks to the Lord, for He is good! For His mercy endures forever. ... Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble, And He delivered them out of their distresses ... Then they cry out to the Lord in their trouble, And He brings them out of their distresses ... (Psalm 107: 1, 6, 28, bold mine).

Hear me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have relieved me in my distress; Have mercy one me, and hear my prayer. ... Be angry, and do not sin. Meditate within your heart on your bed, and be still. Selah. ... And put your trust in the Lord. ... Lord, lift up the light of Your countenance upon us (Psalm 4:1, 4a, 5b, 6b, bold mine).

The disciples doubted even when the Son of God was with them. As we move towards Christmas and the celebration of Emmanuel - God with us - we are reminded that the Holy Spirit lives within us. That God is with us today just as He was with the disciples and that we have no more reason to fear than they did.