Sunday night, a couple in our Bible Study group suggested a barbecue at their house tonight for all the members in the group. Sunday was a glorious day and eating outside sounded like a great idea. We agreed.
This morning we woke to rain. And the temperature wasn't exactly tropical either. I assumed the barbecue would be cancelled or that we would decide not to go. After a late breakfast (DH not me) DH and I went grocery shopping.
DH: "What do you want to take tonight?"
Surprised I asked him if we would still be going.
DH: "Why not?"
Several reasons ran through my mind:
Because it's raining. And it's cold. And I don't want to stand outside in weather like this.
Because it will be noisy. All those kids inside ... I can already feel a major headache coming on.
Because I'll have to make small talk. If it's raining I can't go wander around the garden and just enjoy the setting.
Because I'll have to bake something and I've already planned my day.
Because there'll be people there. Lots of them.
Because I'd rather not.
Because ... I'm an introvert and a night at home in front of the fire sounds absolutely wonderful!
DH is no extrovert. He avoids groups situations as much as I do. I suspect he just has a greater sense that we should go than I do.
So now I'm off to bake Chinese Ginger Syrup Cake and I just hope it turns out.
Before I go, I want to add this link that Son#2 sent me when he read my blog: Caring for Your Introvert. Scroll down and read the Dos and Don'ts. If you're an introvert, you'll probably identify with most, if not all, of them.
And for those that struggle to know why God has made them this way and have tried to be more like the extrovert Christian this article hopefully will encourage you. I loved the author's concluding statement so much that I'm going to borrow it and use it here:
Introversion isn't something to be cured; it's something to be celebrated!
This morning we woke to rain. And the temperature wasn't exactly tropical either. I assumed the barbecue would be cancelled or that we would decide not to go. After a late breakfast (DH not me) DH and I went grocery shopping.
DH: "What do you want to take tonight?"
Surprised I asked him if we would still be going.
DH: "Why not?"
Several reasons ran through my mind:
Because it's raining. And it's cold. And I don't want to stand outside in weather like this.
Because it will be noisy. All those kids inside ... I can already feel a major headache coming on.
Because I'll have to make small talk. If it's raining I can't go wander around the garden and just enjoy the setting.
Because I'll have to bake something and I've already planned my day.
Because there'll be people there. Lots of them.
Because I'd rather not.
Because ... I'm an introvert and a night at home in front of the fire sounds absolutely wonderful!
DH is no extrovert. He avoids groups situations as much as I do. I suspect he just has a greater sense that we should go than I do.
So now I'm off to bake Chinese Ginger Syrup Cake and I just hope it turns out.
Before I go, I want to add this link that Son#2 sent me when he read my blog: Caring for Your Introvert. Scroll down and read the Dos and Don'ts. If you're an introvert, you'll probably identify with most, if not all, of them.
And for those that struggle to know why God has made them this way and have tried to be more like the extrovert Christian this article hopefully will encourage you. I loved the author's concluding statement so much that I'm going to borrow it and use it here:
Introversion isn't something to be cured; it's something to be celebrated!
Comments
However, I certainly understand about people expecting extroverts, especially in ministry roles. And the reason I included the 'Evangelism for Introverts' Link is because over the years I've heard so many people say that anyone can just go up to someone they don't know and start 'witnessing'. Well I can't and it's not because I'm hopeless or inferior or a failure as a Christian but because God didn't make me to be like that.. I agree that He has a task for me to do but I don't believe it involves too much talking!
I hope you find some peace in your role and thanks again for your comments.
April, I wanted to edit this post after I'd published it and add the link to your blog but my family were tying up the computer.
I loved these Dos and Don'ts:
DO say hello. Just don’t say anything else. As much as I may love you, I wasn’t planning on seeing you on the street. If I had something to say to you besides hello, I would’ve scheduled a lunch or something.
DON’T make conversation in a line of any sort. Talking in lines should be illegal. There’s no clearer example of a situation where I set out to do something that did not include having a conversation. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to change my plans for lunch after seeing someone I know in line. I wish it were socially acceptable to wear a huge cardboard box while waiting in line. If you see me, pretend I am.
DON’T call me “serious.” For some reason, it’s taboo to say anything thoughtful in a group setting. I can’t tell you how many times someone has responded to me with something like “Wow Danny, you’ve really thought that through,” and then chuckled, as if I were some sort of novelty. Of course I’ve thought it through, or I wouldn’t have said it.
DO embrace silence. If there’s nothing worth talking about, everyone’s time is better spent thinking. Most silences aren’t awkward, unless you’re just an awkward person.
However, I do love, being alone and would choose that rather than being with a group of people. Having said that though, the barbecue last night was really lots of fun (but so noisy!).
DON’T stare at me throughout a conversation; direct eye contact is powerful (like looking into a bright light) and should be limited to when you’re saying something important or conveying information. If we’re just chatting, it feels like I’m an animal in a zoo, here to amuse you with my facial expressions. It feels both condescending and uncomfortable.