"You're weird," Son#5 informed me yesterday when I said I felt like a walk in the rain. Weird or not (and I'm sure there are many that would agree with him - not the least his four siblings), Son#5 didn't hesitate to join us in donning jackets and heading off down to the beach.
We took with us The Craziest Blonde Dog in the World who had a wonderful time chasing waves and doubling back to check that we were following. It would seem that she has a complex about being a white and gold border collie when most are white and black and so set about rectifying it herself - with the result that she ended up a rather dirty grey and gold.
Okay, I'm not serious. I know a dog isn't concerned with the way she looks. And I shouldn't be so concerned either.
But I am.
Yesterday I decided to be brave and go to church barefaced. Why it should bother me to be exposed in church of all places is something that has troubled me ever since I considered going sans makeup to church. I know that God looks on the inside and not the outside. I know that He lays bare all the ugliness of my heart and that no amount of looking good on the outside is going to change what's inside.
"Oh Jules is looking pretty good today, I'll just overlook her selfishness and pettiness and self-centredness. Someone who looks that great on the outside doesn't need to be worried about how she looks on the inside." Not going to happen!
I should be grateful that my sins aren't laid bare for everyone else to see. Those sins should worry me more than going without makeup or being on the receiving end of those "Oh honey you so need a makeover" looks (just try having long hair in a culture that says anything longer than mid back is creepy and women over forty should never wear long hair and you'll understand what I mean).
But sadly the truth is that I'm often more concerned about how I look on the outside to others than how I look on the inside to God. At times I am more concerned about outer beauty than I am about inner beauty - and that's rather sobering.
Chalk that up to lesson number one this weekend.
The second lesson has been to do with how I perceive myself and others.
As I've wandered the blogosphere these last few days as part of Bloggers Without Make Up and seen women overcome their fears and allow their faces to grace the internet without makeup, I've come to really appreciate the beauty there is in an unmade-up face. I've often been surprised at how I've noticed features that were previously hidden behind the make up masks.
Incredible smiles.
Amazing eyes.
Splendid cheekbones.
Perfect eyebrows.
Faces so naturally and authentically beautiful that in comparison the made-up faces seem artificial. And I wonder why we ever allow ourselves to fall victim to someone else's version of beauty? Why can't we embrace who we are and celebrate our uniqueness more?
Sometimes we just have to be like The Craziest Blonde Dog in the World and not care at all what others think and care only for what is really important.
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